We spend a lot of time talking to our clients about how to strategically nurture and diversify their relationship networks. Some people have an intuitive knack for making connections, and always have their antennae out for interesting new people to meet. Others intellectually understand the value of cultivating robust relationships and broadening their circle, but struggle with deep-seated anxieties about feeling inauthentic, being scrutinized or appearing self-serving in their approach.
Given how essential a healthy network is to professional success and advancement, it’s important to develop a repertoire of effective network-building strategies that work and that you can feel good about, no matter which category you fall into. To help you do that, we asked six of the best-networked people we know to share some advice and lessons learned, and we’ve compiled their tips below. A big thank you to the following friends for their invaluable insights:
- Amy Abrams, Co-Founder & Chief Creative Officer at Artists & Fleas, LLC
- Jennifer Bassuk, Global VP of Strategic Partnerships, Storyful, a division of News Corp
- Chirag Chotalia, Investor at DFJ
- Andrew Levine, Fintech Executive (former CEO of TraderTools)
- Maria Palma, Vice President of Business Development at RRE Ventures
- Marisa Ricciardi, Founder & CEO of Ricciardi Group
“Making a connection that requires a lot of work for someone and offers them no upside is a quick way to burn a bridge.” – Amy Abrams
The word “networking” means different things to different people. How would you define it?
“I think of networking as an opportunity to build genuine and authentic relationships with people that can be mutually beneficial over time. These relationships can serve a wide array of interests – enhancing your business, expanding your knowledge, serving the community, etc.” – Chirag Chotalia
“Networking is a continuous connection exercise to expand and broaden your personal professional community. Networking is a selfless two-way connection to help you meet others and for you to connect others.” – Andrew Levine
“I don’t really love the term networking. Words that tend to resonate more with me are community, ecosystem and collaboration. While I always enjoy meeting new people, for me it’s less about relationships for the sake of relationships or transactional relationships and more about building relationships where there is an authentic overlap of interests or objectives.” – Maria Palma
What are some of the factors that have made you successful at building connections with a large and diverse network of people?
“First, having the emotional intelligence to relate to people where they are, not where you are in that moment. Secondly, connecting folks in your network to each other in real environments (not just online) is authentic and has been more sustainable for me in the long-term. Digital and social connections are easy to scale, but for me, without meeting face to face, it’s harder to relate. And finally, owning what you do, who you are, mistakes you’ve made, why you’re on this path now – which may change. Humility and honesty go a long way.” – Marisa Ricciardi
“I truly like meeting new and interesting people, especially outside of my subject matter expertise. It is OK to ask your connections (even brand new ones) to introduce you to others. It is important to meet people with different levels of seniority and experience. Too much of the same can limit you. I also love connecting people who I think belong in one another’s networks.” – Andrew Levine
“Being your honest self and not being afraid to show vulnerability are fundamental to building real connections. While most strangers bond over common experiences or shared interests, I often find that people who have divergent viewpoints or experiences from mine leave the most lasting impression.” – Maria Palma
“If I am networking with a specific purpose (at a trade show, or to learn about a new content vertical, etc.) – I research who will be there to put myself in the right place so that opportunities will arise. Secondly, I aim to sell without selling – I intend to add value to my relationships and expect nothing in return. This isn’t easy, but if value is derived from a purposeful place, it will be rewarded in droves. When building relationships, remember that both sides should have meaning and value. I don’t build relationships just to close a deal, but rather I take the time to create a meaningful relationship by getting to know the people personally. Lastly, always find something to learn. Whether it be about a new innovation or even a new restaurant, this provides for a more authentic approach and a great way to start a new friendship.” – Jennifer Bassuk
Does your approach to building new relationships and managing existing relationships change when you’re making a transition vs. on an ongoing basis? If so, how?
“If you approach your network only when you need help, you have less of a chance of getting a good response. I think it is a give and take that requires thought, maintenance and cultivation all the time.” – Amy Abrams
“Yes. When making a transition (personal or professional), I tend to seek out those who have been through that type of transition before, for context. For example, how to handle going back to work after becoming a mom, getting acquired by another firm, having a difficult team member to manage, starting my own business, etc. It’s also more relatable to meet new people when you’re in a similar situation.” – Marisa Ricciardi
“The biggest difference is available time. When you are working it is not easy to broaden your network outside your “work network”. However, one of the most successful senior executives I know found the time to build and acquire numerous companies while building an incredible non-work network…so it can be done.” – Andrew Levine
“Not at all. My approach is an “always-on” style. I tend to stay in roles for several years, and thus, I network to create new client opportunities, learn about new, emerging verticals for the content I represent, and to grow my network of friends and colleagues. Yes, I also network to meet interesting people, and many have become lifelong friends.” – Jennifer Bassuk
What are your top three tips for people looking to expand and diversify their professional networks?
Chirag Chotalia:
- “Get out there: high quality relationships are rarely built sitting on a sofa or digitally! Find events/conferences/venues where like-minded people are likely to be.
- Mine your existing network: you know people who know people. Ask your network if there are people they might refer you to. Be specific and targeted about what you’re looking for and people will often open up their networks for you.
- Proactively think about how to add value to the person you are seeking to meet. Maybe lead with that in your interaction. “
Amy Abrams:
- “Ask questions and listen carefully and approach people with how you can help them vs. how they can help you.
- See any opportunity to meet new people as an opportunity to expand your network.
- Be gracious.”
“It’s important to be deliberate about how you network. This means considering your opening phrase, what you will talk about, and your “ask” if you have one, but not so much that you are paralyzed. It’s a balance like everything else. And, 99% of the time, the person you talked to won’t remember your initial approach, but they will remember how you made them feel and what you asked of them.” – Jennifer Bassuk
Andrew Levine:
- “It’s a two way street. Building a successful network requires you to help other people connect.
- The quality of people you meet when networking is unpredictable. You can just as easily be surprised on the upside as the downside.
- Your network is never big or diverse enough.”
Maria Palma:
- “Don’t be afraid to ask (for a meeting, an introduction, etc.) – the worst that can happen is that someone will say no.
- If you want the meeting, take the initiative and be proactive (propose times, send the calendar invite, go to them, send the follow up).
- Always ask how you can be helpful to others.”
Marisa Ricciardi:
- “Whether you live in a B2B world or B2C, we are all people. I won’t meet anyone on the phone; take the time to meet human to human.
- Don’t categorize your networks as professional vs. personal; the lines are blurred. Other parents at school, your neighbors, familiar faces on your subway commute – it’s very easy to meet people (probably too easy here in NYC). You can strike up an interesting conversation anywhere.
- Have an outdoor summer party. Everyone loves being outside in the fresh air, whether you’re celebrating your clients or a company milestone or a personal milestone. I’ve always found entertaining a natural and organic way to bring people together with no agenda.”
What is your greatest lesson about how NOT to network, that you learned the hard way?
“You can’t always connect. Don’t over-leverage your network if the party you are interested in does not want to connect. One time I used my network to find different ways to set up an introduction. After several tries, I did not read the tea leaves that the timing was wrong. Instead of making a friendly two-way connection, I left an impression that I was too aggressive”. – Andrew Levine
“It’s not about volume, it’s about quality. Early in my career I would try to work the room. Now I’ve found that it’s a better use of time to have deeper, more meaningful conversations with a smaller number of people. Also, have a specific ask, especially for busy people. You’ll be much more successful if you approach someone with specific questions vs. a general ask for advice.” – Chirag Chotalia
“Don’t bury the lead. If you do have a specific ask or point of collaboration you want to explore with someone, don’t be afraid to talk about it earlier on in the conversation or be more direct about it. Don’t expect people to be Jedi-mind readers.” – Maria Palma
Photo credit: Shawn Records
